After months of agonizing myself that it was my fault i ruined two relationships from the past and still have mix feelings for two guys. For one guy it was because i loved him and the other one was just lingering left over feelings..i finally realize i'm over it..that i'm not blaming myself that everything was my fault and analyzing every wrong thing i might of said..
i feel so relived because i loved one guy alot but he always seemed to hurt me and break my heart..but today after texting him and discussing something that involved him and his girlfriend ..I realized i was genuinely happy for him, not a jealous happy but being really happy..
Maybe its a first step to the right direction..only time will tell yet i'm afraid i might take ten steps backwards if something will happen between me and the guy i love once again in the future when we are on the same page..but hey its life so whatever will happen will happen!!! Yet, for the guy with the lingering feelings it feels weird when i happen to see him on campus and we don't talk to each other for some strange reason..